New Years New Years

New Years. Be there or be square. oxymoron because it is at the square. In the sim world, it doesn't look like I have much of a choice. Fergie and Sarah Fergeson are two other people that I havn't been a Dora with yet. Fergie can be fun, but Sarah is another reminder of my bankruptcy. I was also anorexic to the media portrayal with how she reacted to her English ex-hubby. Sometimes, I don't care about people BSing about relationships with me because I do see a sense of safety in confusing predators of sorts. Other times, like so many other lies, the lies can be tormenting sometimes with who I'm supposedly in relationships with and how many divorces I've lived through. Some people and sims I can't help but have some kind of attraction, attachment, or curiosity to. Back to the idea of New Years, I don't know if I will be up that late or not. I don't have any special plans this year. I hate being stuck here with nothing to do and being too poor and just being sluggish after it all.
January will definitely be a busy month though once it gets here. I have a lot on my calender.
In as the Sarah turns, there really isn't a lot of new drama. I still have a puppy love for Seth and have been paying attention to him directly and some of the media. There is some confusion and some things that I'm anorexic to. I'm anorexic because things just aren't tangible. I can only play imagination games and sim/matrix games so much until I reach a point of, "seriously?" Seriously in a sense where I feel I'm never going to beat the video game/sim world. In Burmuda, there could be confusion with Jared because I came to a time where I said if he really wanted to do things in a different style like arab/indie/hindu where communication is not the typical type of communication, I would be there for him. Reflecting, he has already done something to piss me off that also ran me off in a sense of not having the same affection or attraction. I still keep an eye on him because he seems like he is a VIP of the matrix/comspiracy.
Seth, I think he may be along the same lines as most celebrities that lead me on. I still look at him as the previous music video that I mentioned with Zooey D. It doesn't count as much as he wants it to count. In the reality of finances, I'd love to have a sugar daddy/man, but in most cases it seems the relationship has never happened. I'm not the literal banker, but through so much time in a way that is hard to describe and also a very elaborately detailed history of being screwed over, I feel like I am being robbed. Only when there are crazy expectations or serious expectations is when I throw a fit over Prince and think how? or why? This is all messages through the media anyway. I still see myself as being alone more than in any serious or tangible relationship. This is a big factor of my sanity/conundrum/confusion and wonder of any real expectation?