Hey Jack

Arbitrage gossip looks like you and Margo Price had a love affair going on. I thought she was married, but I wouldn't be surprised if you did have a love affair with her. You're supposedly "divorced" anyway, but maybe there is something that is still there. Maybe you're wanting to take a break from relationships and women for now to get back in the game later. I don't know, but curiosity hasn't killed my cat yet. I'm not sure what I am to you either. I'm glad if you still really are around. I know people like to play gossip and mind games in my head sometimes, but it's hard to get me to seriously believe in what people say. I can play around some, and I try to mostly keep it as play because I don't like the way people would think I would believe them and also distrust the way they take me. Some people are serious about being dominate with their gossip and putting me in the corner, but I try to be as peaceful and playful as possible until someone gets too arrogant, vain, or dominate with me. I've been a very hated island queen. I don't mind being vulnerable and sharing myself with you some. I hope you would want my company. I am afraid to know more of your info, and feel slightly led on to you because you are not preventing me from coming on to you more by sharing reasons as to why I shouldn't. You seem to want me to want you. In my own complexities and Canadian sense of self, I wonder if you're in it to win it with me against the Drapers when it comes to entitlement, or are you really another Don Draper I have yet to understand? You have your own way of being high and mighty. "Die By the Drop," came from my own antagonism against some Don Draper authority and other authorities I never thought were good enough. It usually did boil down to whoever had the most money was the one who was entitled to make any and all choices. Totalitarianism/ tyranny isn't always easy to see. Sometime the tyrants will know you're on to them and will only try to kill you with more tricks or sadistic robbing lies. ...... I think I'm done with some of my ramblings for now. I'm glad to have felt that I was noticed by you. I'm sorry if you feel I have let you down or hurt you in ways or extents that I don't know. I'm sorry that I didn't recognize your name or taken advantage of you or your band enough. I feel I let myself down in some ways, but I was always more of the type in refusing to have anything to prove. I hate structures and fighting structure to structure. I hate feeling forced to scream. When too many things were never right or fair to begin with..........

Random Thoughts

Summer has gone quicker than I expected. My baby girl is going to be starting Pre-K soon and I feel like shit. I had wanted to take her more places and have more things to do, but school will be starting before I'll be able to make that happen. It's not that I still can't take her anywhere; it just won't be until after school starts. I'll feel a little guilty when I'm in Tennessee, but the trip is still a trip that is in need. I need the real fresh air and a peace of mind. I love the travel and the exploration. I have a thrill to meet someone important to me. ..... Fall is still coming and I have been getting ready for that and crafting. It will be an exciting year for crafting. .... I have some job planned in mind when I'm through with being a dancer, but now, I'm not as sure about it at all. While merchandising is decent money, I'm not sure if I want to continue with that and another part time job and putting all that gas mileage on my car. decisions decisions. A bridge to cross when I get there. ... I was hoping for better weather this weekend. Besides a pontoon ride with Mitzi and I being canceled today, I have another marathon tomorrow that may be canceled too. It's supposed to rain later in the day though. I don't know how it will go, but this weekend matters a lot in de-stressing myself. ... Until then, just a short and simple blog.